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How to survive married life

Good marriages don’t just happen. It must be nurtured and cultivated with love. However, marriages are tested from time to time and eventually lead to marital disharmony. 

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Getting married is probably the ultimate sign of love towards a person. For this ritual fortifies the burning affection of two individuals. However, after the wedding, the love of the newly-wed will be tested from time to time. The heartfelt intentions stated before the wedding day guest may be forgotten in the routine of everyday life. This is the time when reality intrudes fantasy. When imperfections that once viewed as minor shortcomings suddenly take a gloomy dimension and slowly grow into annoyance.
It is a normal cycle of marriage to encounter such situations. Even if two lovers are unified as one by marriage, you cannot conceal the individual differences of the couple. No individual is the same, and if these two identities will continue to disregard their differences and will not meet eye to eye, marital disharmony takes over.

To avoid falling into this pit, here are some suggestions:
  1. Accept the fact that married life is not perfect. All marriages will eventually experience certain difficulties. Besides, you married a human being, no human is perfect.
  2. Regularly reassure your love towards your partner. It was a common belief that only women, due to their sensitive nature, constantly need assurance from their husbands from time to time. This is no longer true today. BOTH men and women need reassurance to dispel their normal doubts and insecurities. Your partner needs to feel secure and know that he/she is highly treasured. Your partner must be watered with constant affection and thoughtfulness for them to grow and blossom.
  3. Be adventurous. Try new things together. Go to an exotic beach, go mountain hiking, spend the whole day watching your favorite movies, or do the same old fun stuffs that both of you did before you got married. This way, you will bring back the fun and excitement into your marriage.
  4. Accept your differences. A few months, or weeks, or even days after your wedding, your union with your partner will revert to two identities as the fantasy of romantic oneness begins to fade. This is the time when you start noticing his/her irritating behavior and start developing a tendency to change his/her behavior. It will all start with a request but will soon turn into a demand. A simple comment will soon become a nag; this is the start of marital disharmony… When your marriage is already sliding in to this condition, remind yourself that you are not perfect and you married a human being not an angel from heaven. Talk to your partner and express your feelings towards the behavior but never demand overnight changes from him/her.
As a final note, good marriages don’t just happen. They are nurtured and cultivated with love. Marriages that stayed forever are those that were sustained by good works. Couples must invest time and great efforts to bear the rich fruit of their marriage. There is a saying that “a wife has to submit herself to her husband and the husband must love his wife the way he loves himself”, if this simple saying is followed, your union will blossom with romance, respect, and enduring love.

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